Physical illness brings a lot of resting and sitting around. That’s more of a change for some than others, but it’s needed. Your friends and family understand and sincerely want to help. They have a story or know a story; something that helped them or another friend to navigate a major life challenge. They give you a book (or send you a song)! With anything like this hand-selected for you, the entire work is colored by the relationship and life of the giver. Well, for me it is.

A rather large stack of such books sits behind “my” chair in our living room.

This is great when you love to read and have the time. For years I’ve kept an informal reading cycle, three broad categories of something spiritual/devotional, something for health/wellness and professional development, and something fun, usually fiction. I’ve read approximately 3/4ths of the books given to me. Of those, I have learned something from all of them, and have enjoyed a little over half of them. Please don’t feel bad about that. The truly surprising and odd thing would be to report that I completely resonated with each and every one.

The difficult thing about this scenario is that the books are not all in agreement. Some commonalities and consistencies exist within any topic, but differ in many important details. Books about the best way to deal with cancer are especially contradictory. Unlike individual articles or social media posts, books provide plenty of context and explanation of the author’s journey and thought process. Because of that, this “worst thing” is also the best thing. It’s where true learning and better understanding happen! So thank you, and keep them coming.

Although I’d like to claim otherwise, it’s still impossible NOT to initially judge a book by it’s cover. There are books that I -wanted to like- based on the cover and person giving it, but did not. There are others that I initially -wanted to dislike-, but loved. For example, The Life Changing Science of Spontaneous Healing (by Dr. Jeff Rediger) is a bit mistitled because it actually gives many helpful, practical insight and fairly thorough understanding of the critical principles behind many systemic health problems. One friend had the audacity to hand me a book with a cover and title boldly proclaiming that our bodies are but a placebo and it’s only our beliefs that hold us back. Imagine reading that cover, having recently, fairly suddenly been nearly glued to a recliner, riddled with tumors and toxic medicines rendering you a fatigued and nauseous lump. But I know this long-term friend. There is a history, and I trust his heart. Because of that I forced the book open a crack, learned a few things, and largely enjoyed it!

Lastly are the books that I did not want to like and very much did not like. How to Starve Cancer (Jane McClelland) was not given to me, but was highly recommended by more than a few friends who have dealt with or are currently dealing with cancer. This one appears to be currently popular among this population. Explaining a few specifics should shed light on the general picture of what we’re all dealing with in so many health and wellness topics.

-Jane is far more of an entrepreneur than any kind of doctor or scientist. To me, this is obvious not only from her bio on the back cover, but also by her writing voice.  I’m not sure “The award-winning creator of Bathrobics toiletries” is the most reliable and trustworthy source for such a complex and pervasive of a topic. Cancer is absolutely…emotional. Jane knows how to get a lot of mileage from that.

-Jane makes the assumption that her rather horrific and traumatic experience in the UK healthcare system is the rule for all patients. To deny or invalidate her experience would be wrong. Indeed, the system is far from perfect. But readers should be reminded that everything that she writes about mainstream medical systems and treatments are tainted by her personal trauma (and two or three burnt out, plain uncaring, and likely overworked oncologists). My personal experience so far is quite the opposite.

-The foundation of Jane’s work and recommendations sound quite scientific. I have no doubt that a large portion of it is rooted in -some- -good- science. But so many of her assumptions are, well, false. I declare “Fake News,” haha. The concept of “starving” cancer through diet or otherwise is highly misleading. While scientists at colleges and universities around the world say this and attempt to use various methods, from a wide variety of angles, to hone in on very specific answers to specific problems, Jane seems to think that she has arrived at better, clear-cut pathways as a one-person revolutionary. Though possible, it’s highly unlikely. Jane describes so many supplements, conventional and unconventional medicines, lifestyle changes, and other treatments that who really knows what treatment is doing what, for what!

Real science knows better, discovers differently, and has to ferret out complex details over a large variety of individuals. Or in other words, throwing a bunch of crap against the wall and seeing what sticks is different than real science.

-The entire “Why?” of the book is based on a great conspiracy. Pharmaceutical companies, colleges and universities, and almost all cancer centers and the doctors have all conspired to the benefit of pharmaceutical companies AND cancer foundations. Being reminded about the exact same problems of “Big Pharma” every three pages becomes tiresome. Using old and relatively safe drugs in new “off label” ways is not Jane’s unconventional idea, but is indeed a conventional treatment and area of study at legitimate research institutes.

-The companies that sink nearly incomprehensible amounts of money and manpower into developing and then approving an effective and safe drug will almost certainly charge a significant amount of money per dose. No conspiracy needed. That is how the system currently works, for better and for worse.

-Just because a cheaper drug or other treatment does not pay “Big Pharma” does not mean that it’s not highly valuable and sought after. Many groups and individual have great personal interest in using anything at our disposal to solve this riddle. A prime example are the insurance companies! A friend who is a distinguished PhD and cancer researcher at the University of Buffalo recently advised me that “It’s important for you to remain comfortable, warm…don’t let yourself get cold for long.” This is scientific, literally based off her team’s fascinating research in mice and humans, looking deep into various stress-induced responses of cancer stem cells. Pharmaceutical companies do not benefit one ounce from this cutting edge “treatment.”

-Lastly, Jane’s tone is highly authoritative, without real credentials, and to the point of being prideful. There is nearly zero humility in her laments or criticisms, much less her victories. Maybe it’s just me and my own pride issue. To some people, her sort of tone may demand respect and confidence. But I’m not impressed by it.

Let the reader beware…even right now ; ) . As always, thanks for taking the time to read my journey and thoughts. I hope and pray that you learn something. Keep reading, and growing!



Gaining “Good” Weight – Diet (part 2)

Part 1 was a fairly broad look at the importance of targeted training and recovery as essential components of gaining muscle. This entry delves only into diet. But it is important to understand the big picture mentioned in the first entry.

Broaching the topic of diet is touchy. Genetics are not all the same. Socioeconomics differ, and largely impact what is practical. Our cultural and even family customs and values are different. At the end of the day, different means and methods do work and fail for different people. Keep that in mind when anyone tells you precisely “What you need to do.” With that being said, here are some essential components for many, possibly the majority of athletes, to gaining muscle. Think of it as an informed starting point for you own journey.

Not, in fact, an “anytime” food.

Food Quality and Quantity

You do not need a Four-year degree or the next diet book to know what healthy food looks like. In kindergarten we learned the difference between an “anytime food” and a “sometimes” food. Naturally occurring fats in unprocessed foods like eggs, cheese, fish, unprocessed meat and seeds are GOOD. Minimally processed carbs are GOOD. For athletes -some- extra dietary protein is GOOD above what is advised for the average person. Ignore anyone who tells you that apples, bananas, blueberries, tomatoes and beans are bad. And yes, I understand the idea of the strict two-week “keto” carb watch. These extremes are almost always unnecessary, especially for weight gain. Designer packaged foods that advertise “no/low carb,” “paleo,” “keto,” “vegan,” and “organic” are not always good, and often are some of the worst things for you.

Grandpa’s old fashion advice to eat “natural, less processed foods most of the time” applies to everyone.

Now, it’s the quantity of food that needs to vary. Much of the fitness and diet industry is tailored to the middle aged, fairly sedentary desk worker looking to lose weight. Ignore all of that advice. Athletes who are growing and / or training and competing with consistency have different needs than the average person wanting to maintain or lose weight. Just like training and practice, focus on consistency. Pound something quick and easily digested immediately upon awakening and after training. Add some real food where and when you can, an extra half sandwich and the bowl of soup. It is not hard to consistently add a little, two to three times per day. Over the weeks and months, this provides for the type of “good” weight gain we are after.

Being Realistic

The body can process a limited amount of protein at any single feeding. This depends on a number of factors, but 20 to 30% of overall calories (or about 30 grams per meal) is usually more than enough. Anything beyond that is excreted or stored as fat. And when you calculate out how much lean tissue (muscle and connective tissue thickness, greater bone density, etc) a human can actually accrue over a given time, it turns out that 2 to 4 pounds of lean tissue PER MONTH is the absolute best you’re going to get. Detailed nitrogen retention studies support this.

Too much, too quickly

Don’t be impressed when someone says they gained 50 pounds in a school semester. Unless they were a collegiate linemen, they would have been far better off in both the short- and long-term to have gained around half of that. Gaining 20 pounds of muscle and 20 pounds of fat every 4 to 6 months costs you more than it’s worth in terms of both performance and long-term health. You should not throw down food like a Scandinavian strong man, sumo wrestler, or the “average American diet” of fries and Cheetos, in order to put on some muscle.

Too little, too precise.

In my (and others) experience, athletes who seek the Holy Grail of simultaneous fat loss and muscle gain wind up doing neither very well. Again, the body systems function as a unit. Our hormones are literally shifted into either “breaking down” mode -or- “building up” mode, and trying to ride the thin line between the two is almost always counterproductive. Please forget the various notions and iterations of “underfeeds” on off days and “overfeeds” on training days. Your goal is to provide a reasonable surplus of nutrients over all days, whether training or recovering. To drastically change your food intake on off days shows a lack of understanding of human physiology and an under-appreciation for the role of recovery. Under- and over-feeds are unnecessary at best, especially for teen/twentysomething athletes who lack decades of experience to know their body well.

In theory, it is possible to simultaneously gain muscle and lose fat. But instead of gaining, say 20-30 total pounds over 6-8 months, the thin athlete adds (maybe) a few pounds of muscle in the same time period. And that is precisely “How to not be a game-changer.” The far majority of people claiming to have lost fat AND gained muscle are those who were very overweight to begin with AND they have either never trained before or are coming back after a long period off. Mostly, these individuals have maintained or slightly improved their muscle mass while dropping a lot of fat around the muscles. The appearance appears “more muscular.” But they have spent time in “breaking down” mode. As an athlete, none of those are ideal. Establish good habits and gain a reasonable amount of weight to begin with.

Just Right

In reality, when the body gains muscle, it almost always gains some fat as well. I like to think that, in theory, one or two pounds of fat is absolutely normal and acceptable for every three to four pounds of muscle gain. That leaves you with a reasonable and easy-to-track goal; gain approximately 5 pounds on the scale per month. If you gain that much over six months, while eating mostly minimally processed foods and hitting the weights intelligently and consistently, you should assume that you’re doing it RIGHT! Most will probably find the first 5 to 10 pounds fairly easily, but the next 10 to 20 will require much effort and discipline in nutrition, training, and rest/recovery.


     What’s truly the better option?

For weight gain, it’s helpful to see a little less black and white. Just like training and competition, planning ahead is a major part of this. Having a knowledgeable and “into it” parent absolutely helps in terms of meal planning and prep. But these are not always an option or available. Surprises will still come, especially with the simple nature of life as a teenager, with varying academic and sport schedules, with hopefully a balance of both spontaneity and independence in figuring things out. College students are still figuring things out (parents are too!) and also have to deal with major moves and multiple schedule changes three times every year! So be ready to not always be ready!

Getting every ounce of your food from specialty and boutique grocery stores may be you (or your parents) preference, but it is just not necessary for better performance or wellness. You should probably disregard the advice from those who do, for they are living in a different world than the other 95% of us. It’s simply not practical to think that you are going to manage to eat from only one source for very long. With the amount of mostly healthy food you’re eating, your few supplements, your training plus any travel/competition, your investment will be plenty high enough. Of course, I think this is a worthy process and investment, as I have shown through the life of my kids and myself.

Fast food

Wendy’s and the like are not ideal. But if the team is stopping there, or sometimes (not always) you are just in the mood for it, is it really better to always skip it or eat nothing? Going by the general advice outlined above, you absolutely can have something decent and still get your fix. Avoid the deep fried stuff as much as possible, for that is some of the worst of the worst for your health and performance. Rather than a double Baconator (or really any extreme sandwich), fries, and soda, go with a double burger, a grilled chicken wrap, and water. In the morning, skip the pancakes and hash browns and instead have an egg Mcmuffin or two. This is by no mean health food. But please, it’s not – always primarily – about that. There are plenty of simple yet tasty and filling options that at least won’t hold you back, and are compatible with your goals.

Black and white  – “All fast food is of the devil and Trader Joes is always good.”

Seeing the grey – “Let me be mindful of any selections, see the big picture, and find something that fits with my goals.”


The far majority of supplements are fairly worthless. One handful of trail mix before you train would serve you much better than designer “amino acids.” Chromium Picolonate slightly helps older diabetic patients regulate blood sugar, but does nothing (just for example) for the performance of athletes. Nitric oxide is one of the most hyped and trendy supplements that does practically nothing for strength/speed/power athletes.

Some supplements are not necessary, but they are convenient. Protein powder is usually helpful. Keep in mind that loads of extra protein are not necessary when your diet is generally in check, and natural sources are generally better than powders and mixes. But as an athlete, sometimes you wake up without a big appetite and/or just need to get moving on the day without cooking a veggie omelet. I know what it feels like to finish a challenging training or practice sessions, need to refuel, but NOT feel like immediately sitting down to roast chicken or steak stir fry. I understand that while salads and veggie-based, balanced meals are ultra healthy and do need to be part of a weight gain diet, they make it difficult to have enough room and appetite to take in enough total calories. Go ahead and try to get your three to four thousand calories per day in a strict “clean bulk” of all whole foods and no supplements. Get ready to constantly feel stuffed and make trips to the bathroom. Some supplements and a little high glycemic (sugary) type drinks and supplements can help with this.

So, immediately when you wake up, blend some fruit and protein powder into a liquid of your choice and pound it. If that’s asking too much, just go with the liquid and a shaker cup. Do not make this an “all protein” type event, for the body greatly benefits from some carbs to run on. You really need to get some quick, tolerable, quality calories AND still be able to eat a “real” breakfast in an hour or two. Immediately after training or practice, have another smoothie, quick shake, or even chocolate milk. At this time after training, the easily digested protein and sugary carbohydrates are actually BETTER for your recovery (muscular protein and glycogen synthesis) than sitting down to a “healthy meal” of real food. And again, this should leave you feeling hungry rather than stuffed in an hour or so when it is time to eat a normal healthy lunch or dinner. Again, the supplements are still not necessary. But they usually help you to fit in a few more feedings (quantity) of quality calories – exactly what’s needed for “good” weight gain.

Lastly, there are the rare, the few, the proud supplements that actually work. When in doubt, please check out for some of the most clear cut, scientific, and bias-free reviews in this realm. Vitamin D, omega-3 fatty acids, and creatine are a few of the most researched, proven safe, and -actually- effective supplements out there. I always tell young men and women not to even bother with creatine until they can honestly say that their diet and training is consistently on point for at least five months. If you are mindful of your overall caffeine intake and begin to think of it as a sports performance aid, it is absolutely one of the most effective supplements out there. But just like the space devoted in this article, supplements are at best 5% of what truly matters.

Gaining “Good” Weight: Practical Tips (part 1)

The Question

Working as a physical therapist and sports performance coach, I’ve received many questions about gaining muscle over the years. Just like the athletes and parents asking, I have been a bit overwhelmed by the overload of information out there. I have absolutely failed to realize that I have something to offer in this realm. While never claiming to be an authority in areas like diet, I have witnessed many successes and failure by those who are committed to this process. Also, I have lived sports performance and training for over 25 years -without bias. That is, I’ve been able to follow the evidence over a long haul, with absolutely no need to grow an audience or sell a product other than physical rehabilitation and training.

The Problem

The main problem with many entries about weight gain and loss is that they lack perspective or are just plain impractical. So many of them focus on the minutia of diet OR exercise. While bringing much truth and some enlightenment in terms of the legitimate science, they often wholly fail to acknowledge other factors. Athletes asking how to gain weight are at a point in life where carrying more size is not natural or easy. Creating real, lasting change, without risking long-term health, requires a practical knowledge and concerted effort in both diet and exercise, plus one more critical component. There is a whole separate level of impracticality as well: All of the diet and recovery methods that necessitate an athlete or family member with a huge bankroll for designer supplements and boutique groceries, and/or a 40-hour per week commitment to planning and cooking. For 90% of even the most committed athletes, it’s just not going to happen -for very long-.

Rock Paper Scissors

As an athlete, the first thing that you can and should understand is that the absolute best weight gaining diet customized for you is of little use if you fail to train specifically toward your goals -or- if you fail to recover well. The absolute best weight gaining, sport-specific and customized training program is of little use if you fail to recover well -or- fail to make it happen with your diet. You can use every bit of know-how and technology to help you manage your busy schedule, sleep well, and monitor your vital signs with precision. But that will be of little use if you fail to manage your nutrition -and- train consistently and specifically.


[They need to be on point AND in balance.]

Training                            Recovery



Recovering well means devoting some degree of time and effort to thinking ahead and planning your schedule. Athletes, certainly seek input from the coach or trainer and mom and dad. But honestly, this matter of how you manage your time and what you put into your body is one hundred percent your responsibility. If you don’t fully own it; if you see it as anyone’s choice but your own, you are going to decide against making the harder, health promoting choice, or going to bed on-time versus goofing off on-line or another round of Fortnight.

You don’t need an app, grandiose plan or fancy algorithm to turn the phone or TV off and get to bed. There is no food, nutritional supplement, bit of technology or recovery aid that does what good “sleep hygiene” and a good nights sleep will achieve.

Recovering well means saying -mostly- goodbye to the pre-workout, Red Bull, and Monster. Seriously people – if you need that much of a brain jolt to wake up, to get through the day, or to do what’s needed in the weight room or practice field, then go home and take a nap. Then, spend that 60-90 minutes of training time in a quiet room, evaluating your schedule and priorities. Because that Hyperberzerk drink is doing nothing for your gain in quality weight.

Your various physiological systems that make up “you” all function as a unit and are not independent of each other. That 3:30 chemically induced Beast of Rage can easily translate to suppressing your appetite and fidgety restless evenings. Beside, for most serious and committed athletes, the ability to generate “mind blowing pumps” and 110% intensity during the workout is not at all the limiting factor for creating sustained and long-term growth. [More on this below]. At best, it’s just not necessary.

Creating a dependence (mild or moderate addiction) should be a major concern. As the weeks go by, you will need more of the stuff to feel the same effect. And above all, please keep in mind, that training is TRAINING.

Do energy drinks and pre-workout increase your ability to train? They do. But only so much can be achieved in a single workout, no matter how epic. For athletes interested in weight gain, you are making real sacrifices, in effect losing the “war” in order to achieve 5% more in a fairly inconsequential “battle.” Unless you’re competing in a weightlifting type event, nobody cares what weight you unofficially completed for how many reps during TRAINING.

There may be an appropriate use for energy drinks: the actual battle! This would apply to military personnel literally going into life and death situations when sleep and recovery are far less than optimal. For sporting competition, can you afford (much less benefit from) the extra level of mental hype and arousal? For a limited time, these may actually help if you’re testing out max effort pulldowns (throwing velocity into a wide open net), sprinting 400 meters, or about to repeatedly bash with a middle linebacker. But if you need to compete with a sound mind, mixing strategies and pitches and shots on goal with calm collection and motor control precision, you may want to reconsider that Beast of Rage preworkout.

Just don’t be surprised when you walk the bases loaded or blow weight scale balancethe penalty kick.


Frequency is almost always an issue for serious athletes, and many coaches as well. These days, nobody would claim that more is better. But that’s exactly how they act. More is just…more! You may claim that you’re training different qualities or parts of the anatomy, but the body absolutely recovers as a unit. Even young men full of testosterone and other various zeal hit a point of diminishing returns where Thursdays speed and conditioning day absolutely interferes with adaptations from Tuesday or Wednesdays weight training session. Your lack of progress (in body weight) could actually be due to your dedicated six day per week training plan.

The details are beyond the scope of this entry, and definitely depend on the sport and the athlete. But depending on whether strength/size versus power/efficiency is the athletes focus, the far majority would benefit greatly from 1 to 3 days of speed/power training and 2-3 days in the weight room (per week) AT MOST.

Power/efficiency focus –> Two relatively heavy days of weight training and 2-3 of speed and power training per week. Size focus –>Three relatively heavy days of weight training and 1-2 days of speed/power training per week. That is PLENTY, especially when added to various team and skill practice and team work.

Intensity – Most advertisers and popular media either blatantly state or imply that more training intensity is the primary factor needed to build size and strength. In reality, the key to gaining quality weight is long-term progress in the big lifts. Believe it or not, this does not happen optimally with white hot intensity and training “as many reps as possible,” or as hard as you can possibly go to failure. Sure, you have to train with great effort. It’s not going to feel great in the moment. But keep in mind that simply putting the muscle under tension is what primarily stimulates the body to add muscle. And more weight on the bar, with good form and other factors being equal, absolutely translates to more size.

Only so much can be achieved in a given workout. Five- or even three gut-busting epic workouts per week is not optimal for gaining size. Making intensity of effort the holy grail eventually runs you into the ground, and that’s when you feel the need for the week or month layoff. But it doesn’t have to be that way. Too much intensity is another example of winning the days battle but losing the war. It took me years to realize this and achieve something near an optimal balance of both factors, a practical rhythm of consistent hard work AND optimal recovery.

Gear – Going insane with snappy movements like hang cleans is not best. Most Olympic lifts require explosive, total body effort. While this is worthwhile for some sports/athletes, it is far from ideal from the perspective of weight gain (again putting muscle under high tension through a full range of motion). Battling ropes and the seated shoulder lateral raise machine and dumbbell bicep curl drop sets do practically nothing for athletes who are NOT bodybuilders and who have already built, often chemically assisted (steroids) size and strength.

While upper- and lower body plyometrics, water bag, and various instability training, etc are often worthwhile for creating various neurological adaptations, they do very little for gaining quality pounds. There is absolutely a certain genetic variant that can add muscle by using 30-100 lb kettlebells well. Kettlebells just do not offer enough -loading- for the majority of athletes to stimulate appreciable size gains. It may surprise you that kettlebells are actually a great tool for improving body control, joint mobility, and stability. But for weight gain, barbells and traditional dumbells are really where it’s at!

Unstructured Exercise – A common non-training mistake is simply doing too much physical activity. Pick-up basketball and landscaping and long walks in the moonlight are all great. But too much of them will cost you in terms of weight gain. For the far majority of athletes, running (or other conditioning) is not compatible with gaining quality muscle. Speed work is compatible if you are careful about the what and when. Coaches concerned with their athletes size, strength, and power, should make sure their speed and sprint work is truly that and not just more grinding type conditioning.

Questions? Comments? Certainly let me know.

The next installment will broach the subject of eating for quality weight gain.

Time Limits

“The days are long but the years are short.” 

Most of us have heard this in the context of how it feels to be a parent. Involved parents certainly affirm it’s validity. The old saying changes a bit when you’re diagnosed with a terminal illness. It seems as though time itself has shifted.

[For those who do not know or simply forgot, all stage IV cancer is labeled terminal. Eh. I do not deny reality. But I still consider God soverign over labels, medical or otherwise. I do not consider myself an average, and have intentionally avoided looking up the particulars such as how long to “expect.” ]

And now the hours are long but the days are short.

When I think on recent days and weeks, they seem to have flown by. But in the moment, everything takes l o  n  g. The standard ~90-minute movie seems like an entire evening. It does make me selective about what I commit to watching. Twenty minutes of walking or reading, vacuuming, or talking on the phone feels like an hour.

Many of us are probably feeling some degree of this due to everything associated with quarantine.

Now is a great time to reflect on the fact that hours, minutes, and seconds are based on a man-made construct.* Our understanding of time has changed over the years, with the scientists themselves showing how the pieces do not fit into a nice unified picture. Atomic clocks can accurately hold pace to within one second of error every hundred million years. It seems a little odd to even worry about that when time itself is not a constant that precise.

Time is not a constant at all. Speed and gravity both will independently change the passage of time! And while 24 hours is the average of days over a year, any single day (as defined by a full rotation of the earth) varies by up to ~30 seconds plus or minus 24 hours. The written definition of time** intentionally omits the words “stable” and “constant,” and now includes phrases like “conscious experience.”

Doesn’t that make you raise an eyebrow?

What if our experience means something? What if we trusted our perception? That’s a bad idea if we’re trying to calculate how to land a fancy remote control car on mars. But we probably should at least some of the time. The way we usually think of time probably has an up- as well as a down-side. Maybe the “second” is unnatural, somewhat like a bag of Doritoes, like Weed & Feed lawn fertilizer, or a composite baseball bat.

Imagine a world with no precise ways to track time. The hours, minutes, seconds blur into each other, analog style, with no man-made divisions. The best you can do is go by the imprecise observation of shadows, and knowing that the day destroys the night; night divides the day. As anyone who has tried to build or use a sundial can attest, even this can be confusing unless you live near the equator. After that, you have to go with something that approximates the lunar cycle. Months!

“I’ll be coming off the plane through terminal E. Meet me there in a half moon.”

“With this specific weight training and plyometric throwing program, I’m hoping to get my fastball up to 2,160 miles/day.”

“Google Maps is saying that it’s a two-moon trip by foot, but that’s walking non-stop. By horseback it’s only 6 days.”

I’m sure our lives would be much different in this hypothetical scenario. But Galileo and his gravity driven pendulum arrived for better and for worse. It wasn’t long until the clean, divided passage of time would order rule our days and nights.

” I’ll set the alarm for 6:15.”

“What time do we get there?”

“When is the Zoom meeting?”

“Did he really run a 4.46?”

“It sounds like a good hourly rate until you find that you’re working 10-hour days.”

Time perception is not the only thing changing for me. We’re all changing to some extent. But I notice fundamental changes in…the mystery that is Robert Walter Gorinski. Yes, Walter, after my great uncle. They’re not all good or bad.

Much of the time I see little need for playfulness (like Luna, our mild mannered huskie). Shenanigans like flips and jumping in the creek, even on hot days, seem unnecessary.  There is less patience from me toward and then between the kids. My natural handwriting is different…neater. I wear out easier both physically and mentally, and this absolutely translates to more introverted tendencies. But I can sit still and focus for greater periods. People write and talk about stress being one factor in getting cancer. But I’m certain that my -perceived- stress was a good deal less before having it.

Sure…we all need to go easy on ourselves, with less getting out, more cabin fever, the thinking about the virus and the economy and an uncertain future. I surely have some of that, second to a tiring diagnosis, chemical, hormonal, and plenty of external and internal changes. For these I need God for his mercy and strength and hope!

There are plenty of things that I hope for; things to be restored. But definitely not all of it. How much of “before” do you really want back? How much should we really expect to be fully restored?

Time will tell.

– – – – – – – – –

– – – – – – – – –

**The second is the duration of 9,192,631,770 periods of the radiation corresponding to the transition between the two hyperfine levels of the ground state of the caesium-133 atom.

-13th official meeting of the International Committee of Weights and Measures, 1967


**Time is the indefinite continued progress of existence and events that occur in an apparently irreversible succession from the past, through the present, into the future. Time is a component quantity of various measurements used to sequence events, to compare the duration of events or the intervals between them, and to quantify rates of change of quantities or in the conscious experience.

-Wikipedia definition of time.

Functional Training is for Everyone

One of my favorite pastimes as a boy was turning over rocks in the various creeks and woodland streams near my Southwestern PA home. I was in search of salamanders, crayfish, frogs, and any other treasures that inhabited those areas.

I realized that I was quite limited in the size and number of rocks that could be moved. Muscles adapt and strengthen to an extent, but even fifteen minutes of this labor of love began to feel like backbreaking work. I was sure that larger prizes lay under the larger rocks, if only my 10-year-old frame could move them.

It is counter-intuitive that a person may lift something without using their arms. But one day, I realized that if I could straddle a larger rock and establish a solid grip, I could then stiffen my arms and torso but otherwise not really use them. The arms and torso were simply a conduit from my lower body to my hands. This way, relatively larger muscles in the hips and legs could do the heavy moving.

I was amazed to find that my rock turning limits did indeed immediately triple, and I did not tire nearly as easy. My creature finding abilities soared (well, in my mind). I had unintentionally stumbled into what adult physical therapy and strength coaches of today call functional training.

For athletes and adults of all ages, functional training involves building strength in a manner that optimizes efficient, graceful movement among all body segments. Gaining muscle size may or may not be an additional goal, but a combination of strength and flexibility is always a result. Functional training makes use of open space and basic free weights such as barbells, dumbbells, and kettlebells. This is opposed to training methods that involve the trainee usually seated on and supported by various weight training machines that work one or two muscles at a time. In Functional Training, the body is exercised as an integrated unit with no machine-guided path to balance and stabilize the resistance.

As a side note, cardiovascular type training such as treadmills, stationary bikes, and ellipticals do provide health benefits. But these do not substantially change the coordination of body segments, literally how you move, when your body is called upon to pick up a bag of mulch, reach high overhead to catch a ball, or pick an apple from a tree. Long duration stretching and dance-y type circuit training will not do much to keep our humerus from dislocating when we miss the bottom stair (fall) or our dog surprises  with our shoulder with a sudden tug at the leash.

Mulching the garden takes time and effort

Functional training and its tools are not new. They were first used by old time weightlifters and strong men who were part of circuses or simply strength hobbyists. Most people didn’t identify with that image, and the fitness industry responded by creating gyms and gym culture filled with many of the technology dependent training that rose to popularity in the 1970s through 1990s. In recent years, many if not most gyms have incorporated a Functional Training section that includes free weights, various semi firm boxes, and other basic (but effective) equipment.

What is relatively new in functional training, however, is the known benefit of individual evaluation and exercise prescription. While functional training sparks significant improvement in our resiliency and ability to move well outside of the gym, without the fixed guidance and other limitation that exercise machines have to offer, there are certainly risks involved. Many individuals suffer injury when they jump into the wrong exercises for their body type and abilities, or use unrealistic progression (too much too soon).

Some individuals benefit from 2 to 6 weeks of light posture and targeted mobility work before they are able to safely perform body weight squats or press even a light weight overhead with the correct form. For more advance athletes and fitness minded folks, please understand that the elite level competitions and tests that you see on TV and social media are not how you (or any athlete) needs to train on a regular basis. Outstanding improvements outside of the gym can absolutely be achieved without taking workouts to those extreme levels. Even athletes are beginning to learn that -too much- tearing the body down leaves no room for recovery and growth.

Qualified physical therapists and personal trainers will be able to assist you with a comprehensive movement screen and create a training program that is appropriate for you. See a physical therapist to address any areas of pain or significant restriction that you have been dealing with before beginning a functional training program.


Now I’m digging up a grave, from my past
But I’m a whole different person
And it’s a gift and a curse
But I cannot reverse it…          -J World


Working through this diagnosis is a learning process. The previous post mentioned that it certainly keeps me on my toes. I’ve described some of the side effects. They are wearing and seem to be progressive. At the same time, I do notice unmistakable physical improvement in the original, direct effects of the cancer.

The seasons are currently on my side. I’ve always been one who thrives on the idea of summer. The transition to warmer weather along with literal, measurable improvements in blood and marrow, has lifted me. It’s nice to not constantly fight off the frigid : \ 20- and 45-degree weather.

Being stirred to more activity is a very real sign of healing. Today cannot be compared to what was being felt and left undone in February. Yesterday I walked continuously for 45 minutes at a -decent- clip. Before, 200 meters down to and back from the cul de sac was really pushing it. But this improved capacity, simply being out more, has also brought desire. The beautiful weather, which I have not witnessed since my health was fine, has been a reminder. It has revealed many…reversals.

Yesterday’s walk contained a great deal of heavy breathing and dragging my …feet… up a hill that for years was jumped and sprinted with the guys.  Amy and I returned home, and then I sat down. I vacuumed some of the basement, picked up fallen sticks in the back yard. And then I sat down. I prepped the weed eater, tested it out for less than 10 minutes. And then… That session of sitting was topped with a snack and retreat to the couch.

There comes a time in the life of the far majority of young men when they physically surpass their father. The measure of the man varies by family. For some it is something like a foot race, bench press, or wrestling match. For others, unfortunately, it culminates in an actual fight. But whatever the amount of love and respect involved, no active and able 13- to 25-year old misses that day.

For our family, that event has no doubt passed this previous winter. The boys without question, and even their younger sisters can run circles around me. Not only has the torch been passed, but roles have been remarkedly reversed.

“Dad don’t lift that. I got it.”

“Just wait here – I’ll run over and get it.”

“Will you make some eggs for (dad) as well?”

“Dad – here we can get off our bikes and push up the hill. It’s going to be tuff, but take your time and you’ll make it.”

Hearing this last one from a concerned young daughter will stop any dad in his slow tracks. “Thanks M. I need a minute.” Ugh. It seems like just yesterday…

There are other obvious reversals. Recovering from cancer and it’s treatment is a 180 from my mode of opertion. There are no efficiencies. I’m not serving or providing for anyone (in a tangible way, anyway). I have little fight, and instead need to roll with what strikes me at the moment. This is foreign territory.

Routine, structure, and knowing (somewhat) what to expect on a daily and weekly basis are the foundations of being purposeful and efficient in just about everything. It is the oppositve of mindless, aimless drifting. Many authors and even scientists have express how it’s not motivation or willpower, but “being a slave to good habits,” that is the real secret to reaching your goals.

We lean heavily on our habits and routine, for better and for worse. As years pass, it has the potential to make us stuck in our ways. But this should be reframed to say that it leads to real freedom. It enables our minds to examine what’s happening, to progress, and stick with a commitment without having to attend to a thousand small decisions. It also allows us to truly enjoy times of more leisure and spontaneity.

You want to count on naturally waking up early, having some coffee, read the news and accomplish a few things around the home or online? Bam – let coffee be suddenly disgusting and the after-breakfast period exhausting. If that’s the case, lets roll into a routine of helping the kids with math in the early afternoon, followed by a nap and then some light exercise. Bam – let the chemo fog and nausea hit in the early afternoon, and extend the nap by an hour or three.

This type of experience continues to the point where the only thing I can count on is being mentally checked out by about 9:00 pm, sometimes in chemo fog. At best I’m just plain tired and inpatient with the kids who still have plenty of energy and need to raid the kitchen.

Thanks to so much support, I can afford this rest and what it entails, being largely inefficient and sometimes aimless. I don’t like it. Yet I’m immensely greatful to have the option of sitting or laying down to rest. This is every bit as important as the cancer specialist, so says the cancer specialist. I can usually count on being able to read, and I read far more than ever. I enjoy watching too much TV, though you would be shocked at what you’re in no mood for when under these circumstances.

Finally, the very real ways that I have learned and grown are a blessing. I will continue to try and roll with these reversals, because I really am coming out as a different person. I’m thankful to have some time and faculties to type out a few of such things.